He just screamed at her, "if you pass out i am still having sex with you!!!" In front of the entire party.
His was the first dick to ever be in my mouth... Of course I'm going to the wedding.
I just saw "i'm bigger then that" as her facebook status. Would it be better to make a fat joke or correct her grammar?
Right before he passed out, he said "Stuporman, coming in for a landing"
He decided not to draw dicks on my face when I passed out because he was afraid I'd retaliate and superglue his dick to his stomach....he knows me too well.
Dude's from Puerto Rico. Majoring in Spanish is like us majoring in drinking with a minor in watching Forgetting Sarah Marshall.
While you were in the ER we decided to tailgate in the parking lot until security told us that's not allowed.
am i gonna have visuals on this?
you are gonna see the trees puking up fireworks and ninja pheonixes will shit rainbows and fire
He is into some weird shit i walked in his room last night he was waving his hard dick around hitting shit yellin cock fight
It looked like his dick was wearing an argyle sweater.
I really wanted to suck your dick, but I also didn't want to miss any of the movie
What's dad's email?
askmom@cause.idk
just bought myself a "your about to get violated in every way so you deserve this chipotle" steak bowl.
She was here for a threesome... She doesn't have to put the new roll of toilet paper on the dispenser. She can leave the new roll wherever she wants!
A good example of deductive reasoning: Knowing that when my girlfriend texts me "I promise not to smoke all your weed!" that she is...at that VERY moment...Smoking All Of My Weed.
Randomize
