i dont remember who you are as you are in my phone as "mr. peanut."
You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
it's official, i've been high in 26 different states, and three different countries.
I can't believe all the places I got into shoeless last night. Apparently no one will say no to a girl covered in paint with a ripped shirt
Please don't be alarmed by the blood on my arms and phone in the morning. It's not mine.
Everything sucks i just wanna cry and smoke a bowl and pet my cat and die. All at the same time
I'm watching sex and the city with my wine and Wendy's. I'm not sure if this is single woman empowerment or not.
My vag is like the Sahara
Ew that's gross.
The sad truth. Barren and empty.
Do you understand how hard it is to go down on a guy underwater? Didn't think so....
Is it a bad thing that I've made out with everybody I work with?
How does one get out of sexting without being rude? I'm trying to watch Downtown Abbey
Do you know this guy sitting in front of us? Asking for my vagina.
ill give you some hints: blood, carnival, fog machine, happy meal.
This conversation went from me banging other women's husbands to learning about baked goods. If that isn't personal growth I don't know what is.
conclusion: canadians have really freaky sex
Randomize
