I dint menn to makr ut w brtendr
Wat???
U lft me at bar, no cassh for cab, may have slept with bartender
I cont stop tolking in a british axsent
Want any specific kind of beer?
Yeah. Alcohol flavor.
Got it. Anything but Miller.
i think you know its gunna be a bad day when it starts with throwing up into a red plastic cup
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
THEY ARE MY AGE. THEY ARE YOUR LITTLE SISTER'S AGE THIS IS A DELICATE MATTER. CAPS LOCK
how the fuck is Katelyn 5'1" and 85 lbs and she tackled a bouncer to the ground?
Cracked my iPhone screen. Real bad. Girl from last night isn't ugly yet. Stop me if you still think she belongs under a bridge. You have 12 seconds.
it's graduation. he's gonna get congratulations slash emotional i cant believe youre leaving me sex.
This Halloween will be different. I'm just here to get shitfaced, not troll around looking for slutty nun pussy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah, this is not that. This is a father and son bonding moment involving my all of my orifices.
if my uterus stops caving in on itself long enough for me to be alive I'm there
I'm eating shredded cheese and chugging coke, until I can function again. I'm tingling everywhere
How did I end up in some random dudes car?
Some guy came up to you and asked if you knew how to drive stick.
i just sexted for my mom while she was driving, i have hit an all time low.
No one can explain why there is Dora the Explorer shampoo in my shower...
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