Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
please pick me up with an explanation of why i shacked in a trailer with a guy who doesnt have a car.
theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
I'm so used to throwing up its no longer a game of hanging over the toilet. Now it's just 'stand up, aim for the toilet, do my thing' then walk out
Just got to school and somone already mentioned the amount of cereal im carrying.
i have a wrist watched drawn on my wrist that it says shot o clock
The cop told me to answer for everyone if there was drinking involved and then i threw up in my Luigi's italian ice that i was eating with a pizza slicer
She saves ONE person's life while blacked out and now she's positive anything can be done "while fucking hammered"
Okay so my USC tutor just offered to eat me out. I think I'm definitely applying to USC.
Next time we include dessert condiments into our sex life we can fuck up my sheets. It's only fair.
I have a better chance beating China's military with slap bracelets than this plan has of working.
That awkward moment when your drug dealer pulls your boss out of the snow
woke up to two girls crawling on top of me forcefeeding me bacon. Best. Hangover. Ever.
are you comparing glasses to pregnancy
Want to go to Victoria’s Secret? His fiancée is out of town and I’m going to try and stop the wedding with lingerie and lots adventurous sex
Absolutely! I love a good sexual filibuster!
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