hey bro how do you do that fake vagina thing with the tp roll? im bored.
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
5 am is for sleeping. Or getting railed on by a stranger. But never for fundraising. Get real.
I know we had a good night last night because his turtle was half asleep chewing on the used condom.
So currently I have a block of cheese duct taped to my air conditioner in lieu of a fridge.
The view from the bathroom floor this morning is fabulous
Nope, just sitting on the couch, eating an advent calendar, being depressed about the herps.
Should we discuss the rug burns on my back or just save that for a separate conversation
I walked home with an awkward asain couple. There was a language barrier but I think we're friends now.
When I got up in the middle of the night, puked in his trash can, and snuck out the front door, I pretty sure he knew it was over.
Seriously insulted!! You can not share my dick pick with your gay brother. He won't quit poking me on fb
If you get me a sex toy for Christmas everyone in my family will question our relationship.
IT'S LIKE LOOKING INTO GOD'S VAGINA!!!!
You just kept yelling "you ain't got no pancake mix." to the tv screen
you bounced a quarter off my butt and it came back hitting you in the eye. karma, bitch.
Randomize
