Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
So.. My internet got red-flagged at work because i did a search on "midigit strippers las vegas" This may be hard to explain...
I gave up sex for lent.
I guess that means I'm postponing our date until after Easter.
ive decided something. ive accepted you as being gay. but i havent accepted you as a vegetarian yet.
I asked if he wanted to come over and he said he was busy. Then I sent him a pic of me in the bath with the bottle of wine I already finished and all of a sudden he was free. Booty calls are too easy.
he asked me to "shake his dick" when he introduced himself, playing naked football with you in our living room. $100 says you two get married one day.
i'm soo broke, the only trip i can afford for spring break is acid
And my coffee table looks like something out of Scarface
I know him enough to fuck him but not enough to give him advice.
"I played a game called "how drunk can you get in a minute" last night. How was your Thursday?"
she used her teeth again, but this time it was out of love
Can you please stop having such an active social life? I'm tryna get fucked over here
She tried deep frying a banana by placing one, unpeeled, into a toaster.
You kept running around yelling "I need my pajamas" & then you got naked. Shit just went downhill from there.
We hooked up and he sent me home with a plant and skittles lmao
Randomize
