You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
I'm just looking at Lindsay Lohan's vagina.
Oh yea! I was just doing that too!
I wouldnt consider it a good Wednesday if there wasn't any projectile vomit involved
the fda needs to get their shit together cause these four loko going away parties are gonna kill me
Although, to be fair, I am both willing and going to lick marshmallow fluff off of your dick.
Just threw up. It looks like I may have swallowed a cigarette.
I NEED ANOTHER LEVEL OF CAPS TO EXPRESS TO YOU THE MAGNITUDE OF MY FADDEDNESS
Dude, i don't know. I don't remember anything after we started chanting/playing "shot of gin."
i think the title to my autobiography shall be, "a bottle of vodka and various pieces of meat"
and this is why you're my favorite gay friend.
I'm wearing green eyeshadow so even if I end up totally naked I still won't get pinched.
you sternly forced jackson to start preheating the oven around midnight so you could make bagels in the morning
you were serious about those bagels
Dude, if that was the MLB player I think it was leaving your bedroom this morning please tell me you got his autograph. It could pay the rent for like six months.
The part where he comes over and ignores you isn't what makes me mad about that story... It's the fact that he ate your tacos, AND THEN proceeded to ignore you. That's cold hearted.
She fucked my eyebrows.. I've never had that done before.
Wait... Plucked, or Fucked?
Fucked, but I understand your need to clarify
The best walk of shames are on the highway
Randomize
