You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
I am so getting Plan B when we get home. Not getting knocked up by a dude with a hair piece.
Goose bottles do NOT make good bowling pins
i did make 45 jello shots and that makes me feel more productive then any paper would
she's laying in my bed with an ice pack on her vagina. how do you think it went?
Just to save you guys the surprise, somebody shit outside of our door.
yeah that's what i said...you fucked him and peed on his comforter
yeah well...Like any great yacht, I leave a wake
Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say
Can't tell if its the LSD or if that demon man just stared at my penis. Cleveland is a weird place. All true stories.
Honestly you'd think more guys would be happy to date a cute female dealer, but apparently something about safety or whatever
He drove over an hour to get this shit done. I guess i win the golden vagina award tonight
That's the second time the same cop pulled me over well a different girl was giving me road head
All I remember is that I was trying to call my wolf pack by howling.
Bear grylls would be proud of my improvisation. Just used her vibrator to massage my back after hurting it at work.
She puked on the floor because she said she really liked to clean.
Randomize
