I may just buy something cuz i have 6 weddings in the next year and a half.
Holy shittt I don't even have a bf
her vagina probably looks like a grenade went off in a deli
Just saw an old man buy two cases of keystone light, a case of milwaukee's best and a case of icehouse. Degenerate alcoholic of senior citizen of the year?
I'm so glad i pay social security
kinda considering buying a life alert for sophmore year
we weren't quite sure what was on that mirror, so we snorted it and hoped for the best
i feel as uncomfortable as your camel toe looks.
Nothing like cleaning dried puke off your floor to make you feel like you've failed as an adult.
I like it when Amish boys stare at my boobs, even tho I can't tell if it's in appreciation or disgust. Rumspringa, mothafuckers.
Apparently the Massachusetts Bay Transit Authority severely looks down on Chinese firedrills on a public bus
Yeah but the people love.
you haven't really lived until you are in a situation where your vagina is hanging out
It's hard to hold down the snapchat button for video while thrusting. Sorry if the cinematography wasn't Oscar-worthy.
yeah I woke up in jail with two different shoes on and neither of them were mine
Willing booties have sort of a tractor beam for me.
random boy in my bed. last night wasnt a dream. fuck.
Who knew removing piercings would be so radical?
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