Remember that time I came into your room after taking a muscle relaxant and we argued about what state has the longest coastline?
standing in the yard with no pants on waiting for google maps to come and take a picture.
But then he started to talk about his wedding he wants and I quote " and yes parts will be choreographed"
I'm not as easy in Europe as I am in the US
Only because you can wipe your slut slate clean & start anew. It's a little known benefit of our currency exchange.
You don't seem to appreciate the rareness of his junk.
Send me a picture. I'm more of a visual learner.
I'm sorry but I require more work than your hamster. I need food, a minimum of 5 pillows, and I need to be played with daily.
no, she just came home, mumbled about being a gerbil out of water then ate half cooked chicken nuggets.. normal night
It took me fifteen minutes to go from puking on my doorstep infront of my old lady neighbor to legit presentable person able to care for children. Bronzing powder and I deserve an award.
You drunkenly hook up with 5 people in one night and suddenly everyone tries to party with you.
seriously, i never want to drink Robitussin again. her face was melting as i tried to convince her i wasnt high and i probably would have fucked ray. his parents thought i was a sweet charming lesbian.
This is why you are not allowed out in public.
We just left the shoe. An app card to Fridays. $25 to santoras and a note that said sorry we were drunk on the front doorstep of the strip club
I LIKE NICE BOXERS OKAY!? COMBINED WITH A GLORIOUS DICK JUST MAKES THIS EVEN BETTER. WE MOVE IN TOGETHER AND THAT PIC'S GETTIN FUCKING FRAMED.
So he just rolled you off his dick and fell on the floor?
We are taking a shrt nap on the sidewalk cme fine me if you want but dont wake me up
He's eating me out right now. That's how bad he is.
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