Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
I'm eating oreos and watching porn. This is your fault.
Try denying you're gay when "I'm Not A Girl, But Not Yet A Woman" comes on Shuffle.
I accidentally requested the ides of march off instead of st patricks day. Is this an omen? will alcohol be my brutus?
Stalkers don't have time for showers...it's a full time job
We have to talk through the words with friends chat so his gf won't find out
Correct me if I'm wrong, but I did not stop moving last night. If tequila gives me that extra push to have an active lifestyle, so be it.
You know, I never expected to find myself with a roommate who I'd have to ask not to have sex while I'm in the room. And yet, here we are.
You fucked her?! HER?!
She sent me a nudie pic with a bunch of weed nuggets all over her tits...what was I supposed to do? I don't hate America sir.
Props to the guy on crutches playing edward forty hands. Dedicated to drinking games is an understatement.
I am slightly proud of the fact his mom turns on the dryer located behind the spare bedroom EVERY time we visit!
I think you'll be amused to know that I achieved the impossible feat of tripping over my own dick
Note to self: don't try to shave your legs when sex-sore. You CANT reach, stop trying.
the next thing I knew, I was on the floor of a Tim Hortons bathroom in Canada.
You'd think that a rotation of two 30 year old men could keep me satisfied... WHY ISN'T THERE A MAN THAT CAN KEEP UP WITH MY HEALTHY SEXUAL APPETITE?!
Randomize
