i had a dream the other night i was titty fucking you while you were asleep, then you woke up and didn't care.
Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
I have only been in this city 3 nights and there are already 4 bars I can never go back to again.
i dont think the girl sending me nudes is qualified to pass judgement on me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Seriously just heard: "we need some good ass wine. how bout this swa-vig-non blank"
hahahaha. Oh virginia: where the south begins
I woke up with someone else's vomit on my ass. That's how I'm doing today.
I vaguely remember chanting "USA" at the pool when we were talking to the Frenchies.
We were pointing at fat people and chanting USA.
He told me he wanted to sleep but I touched his penis and listened to his heart beat start racing. I knew sleeping was bullshit.
Use your nursing skills for good, not evil.
I think Vodka is my favorite. Everything else ties for second.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's worked out some sort of arangment where all three of them are dating each other and they've all moved into an apt. with two king beds pushed together
A true beacon of hope in these dark times
It's kind of awesome I can smoke with my parents and tell them about thetime we used listerine in that bong
I just wanna be euthanized
Thas it
Nothing like a dick pic from your fave ex to make you audibly exhale sadly.
You know you're drunk when you have to be picked up out of a bathtub.
I forget how to act sober
Randomize