Just once id like a girl to say to me in the dracula voice, i want...to suck...your dick...
Spotted on freeway- girl in ford focus takes a hit from a 7 inch pipe while knee driving. She winked at me. I want her life.
im six kinds of drunk right now
I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
These 29 Nasty People Went To The Bathroom In Public
Can we just schedule bi-weekly fucks and bypass all the bullshit?
If my bosses could see, smell or hear me right now they would understand why its a horrible idea to keep the office open sundays
What a dumb baby whore.
We'll wreck the fuck out of my furniture. How often does one really get the chance to fuck through a table with no negative consequences?
Just stepped off the plane in St. Louis. I'm breaking out in hives, I'm allergic to Midwesterners. Can't WAIT to get the fuck out of here.
19 People Who Had An Inappropriate Celebrity Encounter
There has been a song made about you fucking his roommate.
She's blowing me while I'm watching air jaws. I love shark week.
If there's anything else you're planning on stealing from me, please let me know so I can set it on fire
Good news. His dicks gotten wayy bigger since high school. I love Thanksgiving break.
If I die on my walk home, please come claim the body. There is $30 in my left shoe for you....for pizza
Lo siento on account of my penis...