Would it be weird if I brought slabs of bacon with me to the beach?
i was watching some porn this morning and i realized i am blessed with a truly beautiful vagina
trying to figure out who visited the hillshire farms website enough for it to be in my top sites.
Mom wants to know why I'm bringing a blender back to college.... didn't have the heart to tell her she's paying a $20,000 tuition for us to make margaritas and sleep through class
I figured that I'd start organizing the places ive given head. I'll add treehouse right after bandroom
He just pushed one of his testicles up into his stomach and called himself lance armstrong. I can't make this shit up.
This is the first time I have ever hoped it's poison ivy on my cock
At one point during xmas dinner my whole family was double fisting. It was like thats how I learned to drink moment
So I get to my parents and walk in the door so my mom knows I'm safe and alive and my grandpa looks at me and says "were you being someone's bitch". And I about died of laughter
Wow, he seems so solid
The golf course isn't that incognito for sex.
He sent me a pic stitch collage of all the tit pics I had sexted him this month. It was so sweet!
I was so high I watched a 5 minute video of different scenes of horses running. The music was magical.
Just wiped the ashes off my forehead before he came over to have sex. Definitely going to hell.
Her blow jobs are legen wait for it seriously like 9 people I know brag about them dary
It got weird I got a phone call while looking at porn and the video started playing while on the phone full on porn audio.
Randomize
