He finally told me that he's married. I guess it doesn't really matter.
my sex list reads like a who's who of mcdonald's general managers
His dick was as big as my arm. Giving him a handjob was like giving someone an Indian sunburn.
she said 'i love fried rice', threw a condom at me and passed out naked.
they shut off the water. shaving my legs with soda. that desperate.
She's either too fat to type, hammered or has terrible spelling.
he referred to his penis as the bashful dwarf from snow white
it's a simple rule - pass out shirtless on the couch, become an airsoft target.
So... I woke up on a bench with a honey bun on my chest.
I just did a shot of Jameson and two shots of cuervo. Note: this is the moment things went down hill
I asked to see his balls for medical purposes.
all I got out of honors convocation is I've hooked up with a lot of smart guys
Last night I watered my lawn and smoked a joint then cooked a steak. I'm really killing this adulthood thing.
The UTI came back with a vengeance.
Unless your apology includes a 20 something with loose morals and a daddy complex, I'm am not interested
Randomize
