I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
Herpes is a lot like Arnold Schwartzenneger. Because it always comes back. Also, because it is usually in some way in control of California.
This fat girl in front of me just got on the bus to go 2 blocks. Do you think she ever wonders why shes fat?
and before you know it i was laying next to him at 2 in the morning with penis and sadness on my breath.
discovery: the myth about swedish girls giving good head? not a myth.
I made a mac n' cheesicle. Better in my head than in real life. Gonna keep smoking to see if it gets better.
I got really high with eric & scott.. they're discussing why words sound the way they do.. it's going to get messy
come in to starbucks and ill make you a 4loko latte before theyre banned
did you by any chance leave me that 7 minute long voicemail of you running and constantly tripping into bushes?
I'm still waiting for my blazer that I left at your apartment, you owe me a blowjob for every day from Thursday on that it's late.
i licked icing off his dick. in front of his sister.
Amazing. Super drunk. We stole a street sign in a golf cart and went around jousting trash cans all night.
As a Chick-Fil-A employee, I think you'd appreciate the visual of me almost accidentally pulling out my wallet with a thong hooked on it as I payed for my waffle fries just now.
I think he bit my vagina. Who does that?
Just got hit on by a 28-year old, quadraplegic, triple-cancer-survivor redneck. Now updating bucket list to meet newfound standards.
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