watching a tv show about cocaine.. just explained to my mom why the test monkey chose coke over food
Do you ever think that bumblebee is the gay transformer?
Every day of my life.
Fell asleep in bio again. Sometimes i feel like college is just one really expensive nap.
dude. how can brian from family drink at fucking bars? he's a dog and definitaly doesn't have pockets.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
at first i was worried but she assured me her frail vegan body would have no chance at conception.
He told me to pick a safe word. I said 'cactus' and he said I wasn't taking this seriously and that I wasn't cut out for s&m.
Did you just buzz the apartment and throw shit at the window? Josh and rob came into my room and woke me up
Fuck you Ian. U owe me $3.65 cuz thasts what I thfrew at ur window trying to wake ur ass up. And fuck u for not giving a shit
I asked this couple what they would like to drink and they leaned toward me eagerly and asked if we still have THE root beer ... Idk if this is code for please add cocaine to my drink
that's the second time I've left that bar and slept with the person that's driven my car. thank god I don't take cabs..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Her alarm in the morning was Best Day Ever from Spongebob. I'm have lots of conflicting feelings right now...
It's cuz all she eats is salt lick, human souls, and fast food
I just started talking about how noodles were so good
Sometimes having a penis is like having a really stupid drunk best friend. You see it doing dumb shit but you're just not the one in charge.
I was not drunk enough for that final.
after we fucked i left the room and when i came back he was patting his dick whispering "prouda you lil guy...prouda you"
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