I thouht it was time to go to sleep and suddenly I was front row on brokeback mountain
We've got 2 weeks of college left-I want to feel like Gary Busey by graduation.
He told me his mother taught him that move. What the hell do I say to that?
Dude.. You paid a stripper $50 to listen to you cry last night.
Atty had lunch with DA and confirmed I am not the target of the investigation. No word on anything else
not to be a dick but do you remember the names of all your friends i made out with after we broke up?
My knee is bleeding. This cheeseburger is the 3rd thing I made out with today and I think I got a job with the ducks. Catalina is poppin
well its a long story but basically i overcame many cockblocks
at wine tasting. Can i cleanse my Palate with a frito?
porn backed up onto portable hard disk, laptop charged, battery backup in place, two cases beer, handle of vodka, poptarts and beef jerky --- bring it sandy.
I'm not gonna lie, my internet creeping skills scare me. I'm like Liam Neeson in Taken
I don't think this guy is worth it unless he's a skilled sexual amigo
I just set an alarm for 5 am tomorrow morning titled "Wake and Bake Its Christmas motherfucker"
Well, I got fired yesterday. At least I already paid for my Adele tickets.
Liquor has joined the party. Aly just fucking yelled "I LOVE COOKING" and poured margarita mixer, ice and tequila into the blender.
Randomize
