I'm jealous of your bromance
I have found the one flaw to the great pride I took as a guy to not have to sit down to pee...having to sneeze while peeing.
I just got my poem back from the prof, there's a sticker of a girraffe on it and it says "you're awesome!" ... How can this even be considered real college?!?
im proctoring the SATs right now and im still drunk from last night. i really wanna tell these kids that this fucking test doest mean shit and they will just be constantly drunk once in college.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Considering the last guy I had sex with was gay, this was a huge improvement.
Mom brought home a 36 pack of Smirnoff and was all "ring any bells?" and then winked. I'm scared. What does she know?
I'm sitting on our balcony drunk. And in my underwear. Our relationship with our neighbors may improve.
Didn't know hookah bars could end badly. I feel for her hair
Now I can't say for certain but I'm 90 percent are I bathed myself with dog shampoo last night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There arew tilmes ina man's life when christmaas. THerew are times in a man's lfie when drunk texts from a bathrom hyufgirto. So, you know, merry chriastmans.
Totally just railed SuperGirl for my birthday. Best Girlfriend EVER!
Just checked in with my friend who walked in on us. He thinks you two had a spiritual connection and he's bugging out
He was also rolling face on molly so his perception of divinity might be slightly off
I literally stopped banging her when my ESPN app alerted me that the Spurs had won. That's how much I hate Lebron. I would rather watch him cry in the post game interviews than get it in
ill give you some hints: blood, carnival, fog machine, happy meal.
Yeah that was post sex. I was thinking in my mind, no wonder he didnt ask me to call him daddy since he actually is a dad
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