Earlier, I saw a homeless man that looked like Abe Lincoln, and I just saw a guy walk past wearing crocs and socks. I'm beginning to like this city less and less
ha- omfg whatt the fuck is wrong w me. Alcohol+third cousins= bad decisions
i thought he was 22...he said he was 25..he was 19...im 26..it doesnt count if you dont know right?
Spotted: Pepto Bismol pink Scion with Ed Hardy sticker on front window, air freshener, and seat covers. Total Douchette Mobile.
member when we used to take shits together before volleyball games?
walking through the french quarter. a homeless guy just offered me a pigeon. gotta love new orleans.
walmarts paint section shouldnt be open at 3am
Dude before you bang that chick preheat the oven to 425 I wanna make a pizza for afties
How do you not remember?? She kept putting a dollar on her waistband and insisting it was all you can eat under a dollar
Had to go to the urgent for a physical and I gave them my fake. Nurse was a sport though
Two options. One, you listen while I freak out. Two, we have mediocre to awesome car sex and don't talk. Either way, I'll be there by 7
I'll be there in a few.
I'M COUNTING TO FEW.
Signs you do Molly too much. Glow sticks fallout of random articles of clothing on academic row
Did you happen to find my bra? I'm pretty sure I still had it on before we left that bar
Upstairs definitely just had sex while I wrote you love poetry. That was a fun experience 🤷🏻♀️
I have a number of responses, ranging in content, tone, and maturity. Choose your destiny...
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