In these economic times, linking arms taking tequilla shots with your boss as an underage girl is the best job security I can think of
we sang an acapella version of barbara ann to his voicemail...i'm not drinking again until tuesday.
I stumbled into my living room at 4 a.m. to find him hurling my laptop across the room and his pants around his ankles. Clearly his night didn't go as planned.
He told me he breastfed 'til he was six. That explains the obsession with me getting fake tits. Is it a red flag?
drunken yoga. on the beach. senior week. you have been chosen <3
I feel as though the word "tired" has become synonymous with "too high to manage the stairs" lately
We were messing around at his place it was going fine until he said, "I'm going to cum, hand me the shot glass"
She's trying to put on her dog muzzle on her self
I blew him while watching the aristocats. There were singing cats in the background. I think he he hummed along at one point.
There is a mobile STD testing unit set up at my place of employment. In the lunchroom. I may need to reevaluate my career choices. And my lunch plans.
i dont know how he's 22 and thinks emoticons will get him laid. lady boner just died.
YOU MAKE ANAL SEX SOUND LIKE A SPORTING EVENT
We should probably feel disgusted that we took turns eating and drunkenly passing around a burrito the size of a small dog but i’m ok with it.
a guy just skateboarded past my window in a bunny suit while chased by a dog walker
Liz Cheney wasn’t exactly on my list of women I expected to be saying “YAS QUEEN” for in 2021 but here we are
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