He made me a period mix..should I back out now?
Also I may have a condom stuck inside me, but I won`t know til I check the couch coushions.
The kid that passed out is still in the bathtub filled with ice and the empties
The cop asked you if you had been drinking and you said you drank milk out of a cow.
I rememeber. I showed him the picture on my phone of me drinking out of the utter, right?
I'm giving great sideboob & it's being wasted on my parents.
Both of our knuckles were split open this morning when I came out of the blackout, the column on the porch has two new cracks in it, were like the redneck Super Smash Bros.
I am debating about my sub. I am not quite sure I can be the dom he needs.
We're super invested in me shitting to my full potential
We did it to 80's cardio music. Talk about a workout.
I swear every time I see him he's either dancing or trying to touch people
I see you listening to my get shitfaced playlist on spotify. glad we're on the same page tonight there's a drink waiting for you downstairs.
So is seeing the guy's penis that I'm talking to something you're into or nah?
He once bought a dildo and put fifty dollars and a happy anniversary note in the battery compartment I gotta lock him down while hes available
So, then you thought it was a good idea to dress up like the Hamburglar, buy a bag full of McDonalds hamburgers, go to Burger King and throw them at everyone while screaming "HAMBURGLAR!". At that point there was no stopping you.
Am I the only person in the world that does not give a shit about the avengers?
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