im sorry but my first introduction to your dick isn't going to be a pic sent from the men's room
I'm at the house listening to vengaboys alone. Please come home.
Today was my first day of hebrew and I learned how to say give me sex... I think I can quit now
I briefly wondered why they weren't in school, but after the tinier one shouted "check out dem titties!" I had my answer
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude, the cops never think it's as funny as you do.
HAPPY NEWYEARSM FAGTRON! GETTING HEAD IN TAXI I WIN
We talk about tequila and blow jobs the way that normal people talk about the news and the weather.
As long as you're naked and covered in glow paint, I'm there.
I am in my freshman residence hall trying to convince an Asian man to give me my pants back. Never. Drinking. Again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My boyfriend correctly calculated the time I would be out of alcohol and showed up about four minutes after I'd run out with two bottles of wine. I think this is love.
she did 8 shots of vodka. THROUGH A SIPPY STRAW
I have got to meet this girl.
Remember when I said "no boyfriend, no problems"? I lied. Tequila. Tequila is a problem.
You know how I've been hooking up with my ex? Well he told me he loved me and I said I was just there for sex so let's get it done. He looked sad, but he did it anyways. And life was good again.
Could have had sex with an ex NFL kicker last night.
That would've been embarrassing.
I just masterbated to the home shopping channel...what have I become...
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