Hey, remember that girl at rocklobster you thought was hot but were to pussy to talk to? You were right, her boobs are fake and she gives the best head on the planet. Can you come pick me up?
You're dead to me.
ah. the first shower back home is like a baptism from the sins of the past year
Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
Well if my looks don't work with her I'll eat the 50 nuggets to impress her fat roommate.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
hand shaped bruises on both boobs again....i wish i could say this is the first time.
So I just told the bartender I would go down on her. You need to get here
Ok everyone, the frat server is slow because of the 11 TB of porn on there. Either clean out your partition by Sunday or it will be erased. Thanks for your help.
I am sufficiently unimpressed with the options available to my freshly shaved self tonight.
I just want to be able to run around naked and eat grass with no judgments and have people feed me and expect me to sleep all the time.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I manage to fit my wine bottle in my koozie and the rest is history
at any given day I am at least 60% invested in my work. today I am staggered around 3.5%
You made noises. And kept meowing. I have a twenty minute phone call to prove it.
Somehow I went from sitting in a car upside down to waking up in the grass surounded by paramedics. It was a great night.
I just bought two cartons of ice cream, 5 boxes of mac and cheese and a bridal magazine. Don't judge me.
Don't know where this pizza came from but i got breakfast in bed
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