When my options for Friday night are being a 3rd wheel or bringing a gay man as my date i need to focus on other things in life like having a successful career.
im marching my happy ass in there and im not leaving until he cheats on his girlfriend!
she's not going to take you seriously with an empty 40 and a sombrero on your head.
i threw up in a box in my own lap driving today.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sorry but i am wayy to hungover to take mom to her AA meeting.
Wont she be proud, Hailey.
Everything was yummy and fruit flavored and five alive and happymeas.
Btw: some husbands are not impressed by me trying to snap photos of their wives camel toe.
I sewed up my pants, stole his girlfriends white shirt, and went to work hungover like a responsible adult.
This guy has a theme song for the joints he rolls
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'll say this one last time. You are TWENTY FIVE YEARS OLD. You are not going to die alone and this is not the twilight of your life. Stop taking shrooms on your period!!!!
Im not sure if the cops that just came are strippers or actually cops
so is it socially acceptable to send her an "i got my man back you whore" card?
I'm thankful I didn't get drunk and shit my pants this year. 🦃
I just wish he would stop trying to bring his emotional baggage into our sexual relationship.
Even in drag you're still better looking than your sister.
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