You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
No stitches, just platelets and will power
I just woke up to me licking the dognuts
You mean Doughnuts?
......No :(
until you tell me otherwise ill assume we're playing "cavity search" the homeland security game to spice up our sex life
I would do laundry with you but I vaguely remember swallowing all my quarters last night as some kind of trick.
Any day you don't mysteriously wake up in the garbage is a good day.
he brought me knee pads...is that sweet or weird?
I'm bringing vagina and cookies. You'll be fine.
I hit a child with a fudge sickle from a moving vehicle after he flipped me off, I feel like a God. Tell no one. My partner didn't see it.
Eating a chocolate bar and crying over a cobweb. Life is beautiful and I love shrooms.
I know they deliver ice cream, but do you think I can ask the delivery guy to watch the rest of the movie with me too?
I just unmatched him. If your Thirsty Thursday only consists on the gym then I am not the woman for you ✌🏻️
I CAN SEE SO MANY PENISES. There are so many visible penises here.
Where are you???
Yoga class :(
It wasn't intentional or anything but I've now had sex with all of your siblings. How's college going?
I might be getting fired on this week so the only option i see for tonight is to get smashed and have an orgy. actually this idea might explain why i'm not an ideal employee.
Randomize
