don't get me wrong, i like my boss a lot, but not enough to not bang his daughter
Oh my god. I just envisioned myself eating panda meat. I need to get out of this class.
If i have to listen to his problems about his girlfriend, he should at least let me suck his cock.
I just made a friends list on fb of all the guys ive hooked up with. genius.
there r dinosaurs outside my house i hear them
pretty sure those are just snow plows....go back to bed
This girl is drinking wine and watching grey's anatomy in the library during finals week. I hate comm majors.
I literally paid him in shots to clean my entire apartment. he even vacuumed...who said alcoholism is a bad thing??
also, I just found three random bruises on my knee. probably from when I was velcrod to the stairs
got delayed, meet you at the bar soon, found a shopping cart, i am now getting pushed to the bar by some guy that was peeing in the alley i found the cart in
We can do this. We've been drunk at a gay bar, we will not be taken down by a Tuesday.
Me, him and the recently stolen carpet walked down the road and into the strip club. We had to check the carpet with our coats, it didn't mind missing out too much, later the door guy at Subway held carpet during late night sandwich selection.
Saw my drug dealer at Easter mass with his family so that was weird
You're too drunk for my bullshit, and i'm too sober to put up with yours. I have no idea how you expect to find middle ground here.
So... How much of our rent is drug money?
I just got out of the shower and I feel like I just washed off 10 lbs of bad decisions...
Randomize
