Is there a "Plan B" app for my iphone?
you made cement angels. it was a great sight.
My mom can no longer prohibit me from smoking pot..I sell to her boyfriend.
I looked her in the eye and told her I was 'balls deep' in love with her...She said that wasn't saying much. Time to drink away the sadness...
I will probably be peed on at some point today.
wore my lacy blue thong that says "hello there" across the front today for my gynecologist appointment. I live to make people uncomfortable
I asked her politely not to touch my dick
I feel like he better crank it up to level RG IV tomorrow. It's the fucking playoffs.
Want to run by the liquor store later? Tequila Youn should really be in attendance at Party Mountain. No one else could be our spirit animal.
This is the fourth day in a row I woke up with cheetos spread around me in a ritual pattern..this weed is unreal
Pretty sure at some point last night i said to myself "it'll be fun to completely lose my mind for a night"
My concern for you and peanut butter is the reason I am still awake.
Would you paint my ceiling for oral sex?
And I hope you're not misinterpreting us fucking as me trying to win you back. The sex is good and girls have needs.
I just want you to know that watching you throw up out of a cab in the McDonald's drive thru was probably the highlight of my night.
Randomize
