i just google imaged poop.
i'm taking a spore imprint of the mushroom we found growing in our bathroom and sending a picture to ryan. he will then be able to tell if it's trip-worthy
tell me why they applauded then the bartender locked himself in the bathroom when i walked into the bar today ????
I spent ten minutes questioning her on what kind of cup she wanted... Then I asked what kind of water she wanted..
WOAH TOO HIGH
That man deserves a slow clap... He defied the power of the vagina
We fed him just...so many bright colored crayons when he was blacked out. I hope he looks at his shits because this could be all for nothing
No, supporting your unemployed boyfriend IS NOT what credit cards are for.
The guy who's car I hit last night just followed me on Twitter...not sure how to feel about it.
Hey! I need booze. And penises. And a lot of mistakes that I will regret in the morning.
It's 1am and I'm on LSD and I have diarrhea in a Dunkin Donuts. Help me
Me my naked body. You bring the paints. I expect to be a panther by game time Sunday.
What do I get.
Panthers win you get to fuck the paint off me.
Partying with my eighth grade history teacher I know you're jealous
90% sure the total babe I have been talking to all night has a kid. Ugh, so sad right now.
Im so high
Hmmm, well all I'm saying is don't do anything too irrational because you miss him and are blinded by his large penis.
I had to cum in my sink.
Randomize