What are you wearing to our high school reunion?
I don't know, What kind of dress says "I feel sorry for you people?"
I woke up and there was 3 different size condom wrappers on the floor. What is this goldie locks and the 3 condoms???
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
my girlfriend just compared my daughters eyes to gollum from lord of the rings.
somehow a sneeze triggered me puking over everyone in the car
I feel like i could break down a fucking wall with this boner
Soooo, coming over soon?
THIS NIGHT WILL NOT GO DICKLESS
Remember when we had a keg, and then another 5 cases... and like 30 people drank it all?
Everything hurts.
STOP LICKING HIS MUSTACHE
I can't stop drooling did you spike my drink?
I vaguely remember seeing that couple making out in front of that store and i yelled "I ALSO LOVE THE ROCKY MOUNTAIN SOAP COMPANY!"
"I vaguely remember the Health and Safety Inspector walking into my room this morning while I was passed out naked. That's one way to get it over with quickly."
Sean slept in the bushes beside my house again. Any reason he kept screaming/slurring 'it was all a bunch of goddamn lies' through out the night?
Wanna get drunk and make some bad decisions?
Are you calling me a bad decision?
It doesn't matter how nice the shirt you wore to the bar was, you still shouldn't have worn it to a job interview
Randomize
