Moving to Utah. Got sick of alcohol and have a severe wife shortage.
i just bought weed at the top of a mountain, best decision of our lives to go to school in colorado.
he was so high that he wouldn't speak to anybody for like 30 minutes, he'd only gobble, like a turkey.
Sometimes I wonder why.. Then I realize I can't fool myself with that question bc we all know it's bc of his enormous dick
just realized we made a drinking game to how many times they say "hakuna matata" in the lion king last night... hello sophomore year.
I Apparently saved a picture of the Eiffel tower in between 2 pics of his dick. It appears to be the same size. I fucking love Paris.
Despite fighting the urge to vomit throughout the whole thing, I think that interview went really well!
I feel like everything I touch in this bar I'm gonna get hepatitis. my kinda joint
My roommate said I banged on the wall and said, "this dude eats pussy like a champ."
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
I don't remember where I was but I remembered that I hated everyone there
Dude I bought a 300 dollar buffalo painting. I'm no longer allowed to take shrooms.
It was a good dick. I give credit where credit is due. A good dick deserves praise.
...this is why fuck buddies should be only for grownups.
THERE ARE LEGITLY 4 SEPARATE BITE MARKS ON MY DICK. WHAT. THE. FUCK.
Legitimately*
Go fuck yourself
Randomize
