so now she's a stripper
can't say i'm surprised
you were grabbing cocks left and right
you literally grabbed sam's dick and said, "who's cock is this?!"
Bought a water-proof vibrator. Rubber ducky is no longer the one that makes bathtime so much fun.
He measures volume by how much weed he can put in it and surface area by how many people can have sex in it.
i said good morning to each one of his abs personally
We literaly had to peel your fingers off the jose cuervo bottle and lock it in someones room
I vaguely remember chanting "USA" at the pool when we were talking to the Frenchies.
We were pointing at fat people and chanting USA.
i looked at my phone & had a message that said "tell your friend she needs to clean my livingroom, i dont appreciate her trying to turn it into a bubblebath." I give you probs.
i would like you to please flash back to us blacked out in the bathroom when you told me i needed to take one for the team and have a threesome with you and jon to help your relationship. you then told me you had no issue putting ghb in my drink to make it happen.
Highlight of my night: you taking that shot of garlic butter and then throwing the empty container down on the stairs and saying FUCK.
How dare you question the sanctity of Chocolate-and-Porn day
I promise that I won't shotgun beers with your boyfriend this time, Scouts Honor.
Can I fire a pigeon out of a t shirt gun?
Well I didn't know she was a dominatrix...so I kind of just went with it
You informed me your place was now a nudist colony and unless I was there to drink schnapps with the cat I had to strip.
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