He's been sleeping iwht ***
Nooo
Yeah I don't even know how, she looks like her mom smoked crack while she was in the womb
And then hit her in the face with a shovel
Getting fucked up met up rando with a girl I confesswed my love for last night. weird, going with it
it wasn't lemon gatorade
does it bother you that i swallowed like millions of your unborn children
actually, i try not to think about it
and i pooped them out
even my worst enemy doesn't deserve a bush like that
you're dressed like that and you're on the rag, that's false advertisment
i make up for being a shitty girlfriend by being amazing in bed.
He is drunk texting me begging me not to tell my mom. Pretty sure he is about to offer me sexual favors for keeping my mouth shut. I love being the boss's daughter.
What do you think french fries on pizza would taste like?
i already know. Delicious. Use ranch.
Rehydrating your liver back to life is never a good idea.
According to timehop today marks the 3rd anniversary of my 1st blackout
He washed his dick in my kitchen sink after sex. I think he might be a keeper.
Um, when I went down on you it got stuck there. Still had gum in my mouth. Didn't exactly have use of my hands to assist
If I don't get alcohol poisoning from tonight I don't think i ever will.
THEY WILL NOT STOP FLINGING CARDS AROUND THE ROOM! It has been four hours. HOW CAN IT STILL BE ENTERTAINING?!?! I will be under the table if you need me.
Randomize
