You thought that the "chillable" logo on the box wine was referring to a city in italy.
She really thought E.D. was a sexually position.
She's the barista slut.
He was going down on me and raised up for a minute, slipped and punched me in the face. My lady boner left immediately.
Lil wasted at a baby shower. Here's to beating teen pregnancy BOTTOMS UP
This is probably the only time in my life I'm going to be able to say I'm going to the hospital too smoke weed and play Mario kart.
If for no other reason than to cuddle with that puppy, you have to hook up with him again.
Pretty sure I scared him off for good. The lesbian in me is ecstatic.
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
Everytime Our professor said "penis fencing" in class today we took shots.
I'm going to three dry weddings this month. I'm flashing three dry weddings this month
If all that ever happens between us is orgasms and dank memes, I think I'd be okay with that.
he asked me why I let you steal the gnome, and you jumped out of the bathroom, yelled "you know why!" and ran outside with said gnome
I think I deserve an award for the breakup text I sent him. Like a pulitzer prize or a donut or something.
she compared me favorably to her vibrator
which one?
Randomize
