So I decided to put different foods on my dick to see which would feel the best
and??
Cake is only good when you eat it
a slip n slide in 50degree weather was the 2nd dumbest thing i have ever done. the 1st was hitting the wooden fence i believed was supposed to "help us stop"
Some asshole just brought BK into my summer class, im already high as hell, i did not need another way to not pay attention
he just made me do "this little piggy" to his toes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sitting in the library studying = googling how to get laid in the library.
Of course not. I'd be offended if you didn't bring my boobs into casual conversation.
I was about to share my drunken story from the weekend, but two friends getting married and one finding out she's pregnant makes Saturday in jail look a little suspect.
The fact I have to evaluate my choice between tequila and fruity pebbles is a clear image of my life right now
Just walked past the field playing Jesus music with a fanny pack full of condoms and beer. Happy Sunday.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you just have the mind of an innocent, non-tainted child.
YOU KNOW THAT'S BULLSHIT BECAUSE YOU'RE THE REASON IT'S BULLSHIT
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
I touched a dick in church today
He sang a ten minute song about me sitting on his face and eating quesadillas. Pretty sure I have to marry him.
You know what i hate? I hate when the ppl you drunkenly made out with actually want to talk to you sober. It just doesn't work that way sir.
dude the water is back on, you can stop shitting under the tree . . .
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