Black thong, sheer white shorts not a professional look. This chick has no idea what sunlight makes her outfit look like.
i hope thats the last time i ever see ryan's hairy ass fucking
Sitting in class thinking wow im glad im not hungover...and then i realized im still drunk.
im trying to make cookies in the george foreman
You couldn't find any paper towel to clean up the wine you spilled, so you tried to use her cat.
ooh i remember now. Not very absorbent.
You're not invited to the wedding. They don't want you starting a "who's fucked the bride the most" contest.
She came to college a virgin and left on court order. We ruined her.
the night got glorious when you tried to do an upside down keg stand with a near empty key and dropped it on your face
don't pay it forward
I eont pay shit forward. told a stranger to call an abulance and peaced
Post walk of shame: realized the underwear I put on when I left was another girl's underwear.... woof
I left the bar I'm on a bench across from the bowling alley taking a nap please come get me. I've had three lollipops.
My friend had to carry her up the steps on his shoulder, and then she got up, found an ironing board and set it up in my friend's room just in case he needed to iron things.
Her tits are absolutely massive. Like ripleys believe it or not shit
I feel like I spent all day wearing underpants made entirely of poison ivy and sandpaper
Doing a small happy dance cause my cocaine successfully went through airport security