Haven't eaten in 11 hrs. I am gonna have so much material to talk about with anorexic girls now
Seriously, I'm delusional. Idk how these models even walk on the runway
She made me repeat after her: "I take responsibility for what I put in my own mouth."
I was just tapping my foot in the bathroom at Penn Station just PRAYING for anonymous sex. You know how that goes.
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
I was chocking and even did the sign for it..And you continued to just laugh
They are currently going door-to-door asking the neighbors to donate money for Cheez-Its and gift wrap. They asked me to stay back at the house to make another pitcher of margaritas.
should my break up email to my English professor be in MLA format?
In all seriousness...vodka, almond milk and chocolate syrup make a decent white russian.
I threw up sweet potatoes. Worst thing to throw up ever. They came back mashed.
My mom now keeps ice cubes on hand for my bong water. We may be able to work this relationship out.
Why is there a muffler in the livingroom?
First, I just want to say that I had nothing to do with it. Second, how good is your car insurance?
I don't know. I wanna do you but I also want a cheeseburger.
I would fuck him just for his dog
Need advice bro. Which one should I take: the blonde devil crying in the corner or the brunette crawling on the floor acting like a dinosaur??
Hey. You got pizza and sex. How much more can you ask for?
Randomize
