Hi, I just found this phone under my seat at a brewers game and seeing as you're entered in as 'fillllatio' I figured I'd ask you if you know the illiterate ass who owns this phone. Thanks :)
we've progressed from teabagging to lighting eachothers asses on fire. this cannot be a good path.
New game: find the sober person in Tbell
Got high and weighed everything in the house. My head is 16.2 pounds. Is that ok?
We woke up, fucked twice, she drank 3 warm heinekins to cure her hangover and said "Im glad you're still hott when im sober"
She kept looking at me and saying "you are the scary high".
of course not. I do my best teaching on a hungover monday. I did the research. im still okay with the direction in which my life is headed.
She said I was the most selfish person in bed she's ever been with and she's fucked Tucker Max.
I think I should advise against you hooking up with a guy that throws "the shocker" up in all of his pictures on facebook. Just sayin.
You need a sexual gate keeper
That works. I won't care. I'll be a mermaid. Mermaids don't give a fuck.
Especially drunk mermaids.
She put a shot in my mouth and then hit me with a pillow..
Got an egg Mcmuffin combo, and put the hash brown in the sandwich. That level of hungover
sorry for the late response. was in jail for 6 months.
Your dick. My mouth. We have 20 minutes.
Randomize
