Whenever he makes me dinner its always mini things.. cheeseburgers, corndogs.. is he preparing me for something?
On the way home from Florida I threw up at the beginning border and ending border of 6 states. You win this year Spring Break.
You kept tellin the cashier that this order was "To Go" over and over...even tho we were in the drive-thru
I wasnt that drunk. Throwing the table off the third story was totally logical.
they're both coked to the gills having a shouting match about the powers and abilities of godzilla. and using the wikipedia entry on the topic to support their respective arguments.
So I've gone into the break room to heat up a styrofoam cup 8 times over the course of 4 hours.. that desperate to see him. Now I have a broken heart AND cancer.
im getting coffee to go get coffee.
Im throwing up in my trash can so I can go throw up in the toilet. We're basically on the same level.
When I take mushrooms I can feel your presence down there. I can feel where Africa is too.
Just keep my face away from hard objects. And by that I do not mean erect penised.... those are totally fine. It's more just things like rocks, table edges, blunt objects, etc so I don't get another concussion.
I'm trying to get fucked by 4 girls here, and you're worried about verb tenses?!
Aw don't be embarrassed. It was all good fun! We've all been there. You can't come to vegas and NOT get a little alcohol poisoning. That's like going to church and not praying.
Dont even get me started. you fell asleep in my kitchen after being cockblocked when you tried to use my roommates bedroom.
I masterbated poison ivy onto my penis, it hasn't been this upset with me since the Take one for the team fiasco of 02.
Who the abstract fuck do you think you are!?
Guess whose grandma smokes weed?
Randomize
