He had one of those small greek statue penises
Now that the olympics are over we have no excuse for getting belligerently drunk for nationalism every night.
If theres one good thing that came out of our relationship its this chicken recipe. And squirting.
Warning: at some point today you will probably see several pics of me 69-ing a blow up turtle show up on facebook. Just disregard them.
I just got woken up by some Christians who wanted to talk about the bible. ways to make a hangover even worse for a thousand trebek
Just visited the liquor store.... for the 4th time today. shits gonna get weird
I'm shoveling snow with a camel-pack full of beer in a blizzard. I love snow days as an adult!!!
He was wearing running shoes tho. Thats like the cardinal rule. You don't fuck a guy who wears running shoes as regular shoes.
I am the fucking FIFTH wheel. How do you think it's going?
Pretty sure my first birthday present will be a pic of an 18-year-old's cock. And I am OK with that
There's a fine line between kinky and serial killer
i ate her out in full view of all her roomates. the word awkward doesnt even cover it.
Why do I feel so obligated to masterbate just because I’m single and it’s valentines Day...
With a word you would own me. At your command I would walk to your house completely naked.
Yeah. I got a Tetnus shot then partied like it was 1999.
Randomize
