So the last day on the vacation I woke up in the bath tub. My mom said she asked me during the night what I was doing and I said, "swimming."
i just spent an hour trying to convince my blind date that star wars is better than star trek. help me
can you explain to me why you commented on every one of my profile pics with "tits and beer ftw" please and thank you.
It's all fun and games until the last slice of pizza gets bong water spilled on it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
smoking weed is really the only logical conclusion to hangovers
I hope he's okay, but I also hope he shows up with an eyepatch
i just was bootyclappin in front of homeless men in a back alley
he needs to hurry and make his mind up... i mean i can't keep getting peed on by a guy who isn't even my boyfriend
Just made a PowerPoint called "Reasons Why You Should Fuck Me" at his request. The sad thing is we've had sex before...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Maybe just the first 2 wks of Nov can be dick detox.
he told me to take care of him and then he asked me to walk him to his hotel. I already have a pussy. I don't need another one
Excuse me while I gouge out my eyes.
In which case my work here is done.
I will pepper spray him so fast I don't even care
the guy next to you kind of looks like a penguin. i'm going to fuck him
He's smoked my weed, stolen my cigarettes, and used my campus cash, but I try to initiate sex and NOWWW he's all "As your RA, that's a line I can't cross"
Randomize