The worst thing that has ever happened to me happened today. I was taking donations at goodwill and someone donated a clearly used vibrator
i have a dinosaur tramp stamp
I understand Curling. That high.
I miss your penis. And I totally say this as a friend. I just miss it because it's great. You should be very proud of it.
I don't have the urge to be a home-wrecker with these two. I think I've grown, don't you?
You couldn't hold yourhead up but you managed to unzip my zipper. That's skill..
Use motel 8. I'll give you my credit card #. i'll pay for it cuz i care about your vagina.
Ahh you know it's going to be a long day when you mistake a beer for a sprite at 10:30 in the morning while babysitting
Also I think I'm starting to get calluses on my hands from my level of sexual activity
We weren't even through customs yet, and we got offered weed. You would love Jamaica.
CAN I EVER JUST MAKE OUT EITH SOMEONE AND NOT GET FRIEND REQUESTED BY THEM THE NEXT DAY.
I got drunk and slept with the guy who looks like Jesus.
Typical.
Please tell me that all of the things I remember doing last night didn't really happen. Please.
Just because I stayed up all night betting on Australian Horse Racing doesn't mean I have a gambling program.
I have hobbies that aren't destroying myself and others...i can make hats.....
Randomize
