nothing this campus sells is worth it. not even sex.
Get dressed up for her? please, I could shit my pants and she would still blow me
its like playing clue every morning after we party. she did him in the kitchen with..oh god.
Yes..we had amazing sex that I have a 50 percent chance of remembering.
Come down here. We are watching people walk through the paper we taped in front of the elevator.
They're doing shots to celebrate every 15 minutes passing. You can come get them.
Did you make me take pictures of your ass last night because you fucked on some wet paint or did i dream that?
It's surprise blowjob week. You should be excited.
You told me that you were mad me because I wouldn't let you 'explore my castle'. Then you said I smelled like a hospital and passed out.
Took three klonopin and turned all my jeans into jorts. I miss you
I woke up with my vibrator in my bed so I'm assuming I had a decent night.
I don't know. I'm drunk and dressed as a pirate but ill do the math tomorrow morning.
You are ridiculously similar to a unicorn, and I want to fuck that unicorn.
6 hours ago I jacked off a a guy for $100. I explained it away as "compensation" for gas and tolls. WHAT am I doing with my life? Quickest and easiest $100 I ever made though, haha
I wish u could call a dildo. Like you do a missing cell phone.
Randomize
