We should go out drinking together soon
I'm still not going to have sex with you
i fell off the bed in the middle of it, and he yelled "5 second rule" and kept fucking me. i think im in love
Don't ask how, but I'm pretty sure my name is now on a lease to a taco bell franchise in maryland...
The douche that always wears spandex at the gym just walked into class with a dick going into his mouth drawn on his face. The professor said "rough night" and he still has no idea. Tyring to get a pic
I have more bruises, scratches, and overall soreness from my birthday weekend than my car accident.
I was informed last night that im not allowed to pick up the bouncers and carry them around anymore. Last sat is starting to make more sense
Im in the bathtub drunk. Less than an hour before the interview. This will be the best or worst career move ever., support?
My only expectation is honesty. And three orgasms every time.
I told him he was probably the first guy to get fucked while wearing Star Wars pyjamas.
Are you complaining because you're getting too much sex to find the time to masturbate?
Well, when you say it like that it sounds silly.
Well, I made it thru a doorway, so I think things are going good.
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
I saw a shooting star while he was eating me out at 3am by my neighbors pool. Doesn't get more magical than that
he gave me a flinstones gummy vitamin and was like, "ya know.. because of ebola."
He pulled out the guitar, sat in tub, and took requests while she puked her brains out in the toilet. I think he loves her.
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