Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
you spent the like half the night trying to figure out the puzzles on the back of the captn crunch box
So i literally just wrote sorry on my quiz and turned it in.
she peed. on the sidewalk. it is 2 pm. Help.
I had to feed him the pizza because he was too blazed to do it himself
Honestly it's a super power. I can try it a million different ways and nothing happens. Donnie casually says "ok this is now a toppless party" and it all kicks-off
You know, part of me wants to die and the other part of me doesn't want to live
Okay. So I've done lines off a bible. But that's just for the sake of being cliché.
Make sure you plan your visit for October. That's ACL festival, it's like every Bro in the country converges on Austin. My vagina wants to go hunting.
You were hitting on girls while wearing the banana suit. When they rejected you you yelled "I gotta split anyway."
He totally sucks at sexting. He sent me a clothed shot of his ass captioned "I know this gets you going." What?
I think I pulled a muscle in my tongue.
sorry? thank you? I love you?
I just gargled with NyQuil
Pretty sure keeping my vibrator in the same drawer with the weed makes it work better. I fall asleep almost immedi
I thought I needed to get laid. Turns out I just needed pasta.
Randomize
