i was drunk at family dinner telling about my gay brothers sex ads on criags list
me and ur bf were arguing about whether coke was vegan. i really hope it's vegan
Whoa, Gary Coleman died
Whatchu talkin bout?!?!
Too soon.
Those motion detector trash cans don't work fast enough to catch puke.
He's Hawaiian. Thank god it wasnt a real American
I mean, I'm all about sharing, but when he tells me about his wet dreams about Oprah, I think it's taking it too far.
I sent him a pic of my tits and he said "Word." I need a drink.
Yea no bueno and I only brought enough weed to last one night. And it was no Hanukah nug, it didn't last 8 days.
I saw the attitude and didn't even try. Line of the night from one guy who talked with them for a while said, "I don't meet you standards. I have a job and would treat you well." She was blank faced.
"There should be some kind of award for sleeping with your ex 9 times in 3 days."
We're ordering chinese food so if you want to get on this obesity train answer me now.
CRAIGSLIST IS NOT THE ANSWER
IM LONELY AND HORNY
I have successfully trained your dog to bring me pudding cups!
My autocorrect won't finish pterodactyl for me and I'm feeling personally attacked.
I can see. My condolences to your vagina.
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