Yeah. I hotboxed a windbreaker.
What's the name of that girl you hooked up with? The one that looks like the fire hose sign.
That fucking fat Asian kid that NOBODY invited is stuck in the dryer again
I was in bed at 845. Affairs take a lot out of people
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Note to self not a good idea to try and make out with a girl when she's crying over her boyfriend
i have my graded calc test (94%) sitting on my empty case of beer next to my desk. this is me winning at college.
Some advice...don't play drunk rock em sock em robots. With actual people. I have bruises EVERYWHERE.
I heard liver failure is in for 2012 anyways
All I want to do is sleep. And If I'm not sleeping, I want to be eating or fucking. I'm pretty sure being pregnant has turned me into a dude.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I hope you gays don't get too crazy after DOMA. Gay divorces aren't any better than straight ones.
How can other people our age be acting like adults when I'm still taking my birth control pill with left over gin and tonic from the night before?
Why am I sticky / covered in baby Tylonel?
It's truly amazing how much porn I can get in while my phones at 1% battery life.
There is a couple fucking in the outback bathroom and at first I thought it was sick but than I remembered my Outback fantasy with you and decided I can't pass judgements.
Not only did I sleep with the guy but I think I may have called my work and quit to go work for him.