can i drink enough to forget this semester even happened?
new years resolution: more sex, less car punching, more chipotle.
dude there's automatic no homos on brad Pitt and Leonardo dicaprio. Everyone knows that
his mom and I have the same butterfly tramp stamp. don't ask how that came up
I made a drinking game out of watching your DUI video, everytime you say " okay, well thats just your opinion"
He said "ride me pocahontas" while I was on top of him last night
I am VERY upset that you called my fiesta a waste of time.
What is the current exchange rate for ramen to jello shots?
That UFC fighter fucked me so hard I have what can only be described as a "cuntcussion"
Everytime Our professor said "penis fencing" in class today we took shots.
they adjusted my tv to black and white ... i thought i drank myself to colorblindness
I made everyone scream the national anthem with me after playing true American last night. I'm pretty much their leader now.
We just had an accidental Facebook titty pic scare.
He ate me out while I was wearing a canada goose parka and a dress hand crafted by a seamstress from yellowknife. I came while watching the northern lights. Most arctic orgasm ever.
My psychiatrist just sent me a dick pic
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