This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
I'm guessing you saw the bathroom?
I'm pretty sure you're not supposed to hit on someone with another guy's semen in your hair. not even at ihop.
Just watered mom's plants with leftover mixed drinks full of Bacardi Silver. I'm such a good daughter.
People Are Arguing Over This Guy’s Petty Reaction To Splitting Lunch With His Co-Worker
Call me when you get back form court. Hopefully its not later than noon. Just remember..win or lose we still booze.
The Vegas crew is in two groups, Team Vodka and Team Fireball. There is no winner in this.
I didn't ask for a picture of your soft dick.
He was just lying on my lap in the backseat screaming how if the cops came he was a blanket.
After we drank 3, we built a raft out of the empties and installed the fourth submerged In the water to keep it cool. Keg boats are now a thing
Girl Logs Into Twitter Only To Find Out Her Dad Is Trending For The Most Outrageous Reason
I'm pretty sure the guy in front of me at Walmart doesn't have good plans. It's one am he is buying a flash light and black bandanna
He wouldn't let me leave his house until he made me orgasm once for every year I've been alive. The birthday sex song did not prepare me for this.
Did my roommate wake up in your girlfriend's apartment in drag again?
And, omg, my eyelids are on fire. I think the internet let me down. :(
I slept on her porch...in her dads handcuffs
I wish I may, I wish I might, get some daddy dick tonight