Lonely and bored. Am I allowed to play Dance Dance Revolution by myself?
At first I felt shameful, waking up naked next to a box of oreos and half a can of cake frosting...then I realized, this could be a bigger discovery than Atlantis.
i was so drunk that i ate a carrot out of her guiena pig's cage and thought it was normal
Woke up with a treasure map of my room stuck with sticky tape to my ceiling. followed it and found $75 with a note saying; "eat this if we're invaded"... I'm never getting stoned again
apparently I kept yelling at her that I wanted t-Rex sized lines. awesome
The doctor said 'youre the 2nd youngest person that ive seen with this condition. Thats probably not the silver medal you were looking for today.'
They thought "watering it down" meant adding more vodka
I'm getting flash backs of last night. They're coming in song form.
My boyfriend correctly calculated the time I would be out of alcohol and showed up about four minutes after I'd run out with two bottles of wine. I think this is love.
I'm supposed to be studying for finals but all I can think about is blowing him on a sea doo this summer
My dog is now used to me drunk singing and sleeps through it. I don't know how I feel about this
That was the night you tried to convince me you threw up your sould because your throwup was black
You knew you'd end up at his house the minute you emptied the bowl of condoms into your purse.
Curing hangovers with more alcohol was a great idea for the first five days
I've just realized that today's rations have consisted of turkey bacon and jack Daniels.
Randomize
